I originally posted this in June of 2015, but as I have been reading God's Word and working in a new Bible study, this post I wrote has come to mind so often that I had to share it again and add a little more to it.
The song we heard was "Find Me At the Feet Of Jesus." It's about giving up the world and giving up yourself to bow down at the feet of Jesus. It's about focusing solely, entirely on Jesus and nothing else. The entire song/ album is quite powerful, but today it's those three words, "here I am," that I want to focus on.
To say, "Here I am," signifies five very important things:
- When you say, "Here I am," someone is calling out specifically TO YOU. For whatever reason they want / need you for something that only you can do.
- You have to to be truly listening to hear the call. Be it a booming shout or a still, small voice you must be open and available to hear it, not distracted.
- Saying "Here I am" means that you're opening yourself up, making yourself vulnerable to whatever the person calling you wants or needs from you. It's taking a risk.
- You have a choice to follow the call or not. Often it seems easier to not, but we're can be held accountable when we choose not to.
- If you should decide to follow the call and say, "Here I am," you have to be present. You have to actually be there in body, mind, and spirit. Again, you can't be distracted by something else. You have to let go of whatever else you may be doing or want to be doing. You don't come first. The one who has called you comes first.
How often do we say "Here I am" and not really mean it? We aren't open and available. We're distracted. We allow ourselves to be distracted. Or, we choose not to answer at all. We do it to God, we do it to our spouses and our children. We do it to everyone. We never open ourselves up to God or anyone else, closing ourselves from everyone and everything. Just like saying "I love you" without putting anything or any thought into the weight of those words, we say, "Here I am" without thinking. And we miss it.
We miss out on the smiles, the conversations, and just being "there" for our loved ones and especially our children. How often do we sit in the same room and ignore each other? We're there, but not really engaged with each other. I know that I do it all too often. We miss it with our families, and we miss it with God.
We especially miss it with God. He, more than Ladybug, demands my full attention, and I don't give it to Him. Most of the time we don't even say, "Here I am" to Him. We don't want to. We're afraid to. It brings to mind 1 Samuel 3, when God was called Samuel as a child. Samuel kept responding, thinking it was Eli saying, "Here I am." To God he said, "Speak, for your servant is listening."
*** This month I started a new Bible Study, "Seamless" by Angie Smith and I have also been slowly, deliberately reading through Genesis and the Old Testament on my own. Whenever God called out to someone, and they replied, "Here I am" He did great things through them, even if what God was promising seemed absolutely impossible. When God called Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, the son of promise and through whom Abraham was supposed to have as many descendants as there were stars in the sky, Abraham responded, "Here I am!" both initially and just in time when God provided a ram in place of Isaac for the sacrifice. I don't believe I could have responded that way if God asked me to sacrifice Ladybug. When God called to Jacob, and he responded by saying, "Here I am!" God always provided for him. Moses responded at the burning bush with "Here I am!" and God used him to deliver his people out of bondage.
The phrases, "Here I am" and "Speak, for your servant is listening," mean much the same thing, but the latter shows more intent. We're afraid of what intentionally opening ourselves bare to God entails, because once we say "Here I am" to Him things always change at least some. Just as Jacob walked with a limp after wrestling with God, saying "Here I am" means giving up something of ourselves and what we think life should be. Saying "Here I am" means being selfless rather than selfish. It means no longer running. It means trusting God when what He is telling you seems impossible but knowing that nothing is impossible with God. Like I said, they're loaded words. It certainly has me thinking about how I approach everything.
Tell me, when was the last time you said, "Here I am" and meant "I am listening?"
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